I, an Autistic adult, turned 55 years old in May.
My physical health is not good anymore.
My legs are still swollen; i still have the awful
huge lymphedema tumor on my left inner thigh.
And it is getting bigger.
I also weigh 350 pounds now.
I went through alot of heavy things beginning in March of 2012.
In that month, my next door neighbor, and friend
who i had had many problems with during the course
of our six year friendship before our final falling-out,
suddenly turned against me for no reason at all.
He said it was because he was not going to run my errands
when i didn’t feel well anymore.
But i knew it was deeper than that.
He actually couldn’t stand me anymore.
And his hostility and hate really cut through me. I could feel his hate for me through every fiber of my being.
So i knew he hated me.
All of the other times we would have our fallings-out,
We would always mend our rift and things would be
good again for the next two to three or so months.
But this falling-out was radically different…..and……
…….this one was worse and darker than all of the others.
He got very mean, and began doing some of the
things he knew were triggers and sensory issues to me……
The loud golden oldies music that
made me relive my painful childhood,
his loud TV turned up loud, and his suddenly loud banshee yelling,
followed by several ugly emails where he slammed me and said i was
essentially a worthless piece of dirt who was lazy and
who had zero value.
He even threatened to call the police on me if he heard my music or any of my meltdowns.
He also went to all of the businesses where i was having problems with employees and their friends who were bullying me (and still are)
to let them all know i was making videos.
I suddenly began getting alot of hate comments on those videos
and even had to take some of them down
as he himself would flag them and threaten me
even though i needed to tell my story
He was done with me. Done.
I have deep PTSD and trust issues from childhood because so many people don’t understand Autism, and we get mistreated, misjudged, attacked, accused of, called tragedies and burdens, and essentially thrown away in the trash.