Wednesday, February 7, 2018

I Don’t Want To Be Alone Anymore

From two Facebook posts i made just now……
Post One
I had a VERY weird dream while i slept. it was a nightmare, in fact.
I dreamed that i was alone here. Connie had gone home. It was night, but strangely still light outside, and it was overcast, misty, and wet outside. In fact, the outside had the blue tint of dusk settling in when it’s cloudy and overcast.
Suddenly i saw a group of cars crowd outside where the appliance shop used to be, and all over the street. Then i heard a gunshot, followed by someone yelling in pain. Then another gunshot, followed by another yell from that person, who had a male voice.
I got scared, frightened, but couldn’t move out of my chair where i was sleeping. I was literally paralyzed in fear.
I finally managed to get out of my chair and use my computer chair to block my view so no one from outside could see me, and i tried my best to call 911. I got a male presenting dispatcher, but could not hear them.
Suddenly, one of the bad men came into my carport and began to banshee yell and kick the outer security door on the door to my middle room. He kept kicking the door and yelling. Then more of them came right into my yard.
I tried again to get 911 on the phone and couldn’t even get my words out.
I awoke from this dream at 11:32 PM, to find that my small alarm clock was blinking. Which meant i must of had a power glitch while i was asleep. My clock on my answering machine was fine, and my DR showed no interruptions in the recording of the two newscasts i record every night to watch when i wake from my after dinner sleeptime.
I have come to the conclusion that i don’t want to live alone anymore.
ESPECIALLY NOT HERE in this neighborhood where i do have neighbors who do NOT have my back at all….but neighbors who are mostly all either the type to not get involved, or they are the mean ones who torment and bully me.
I at least want to live where i have nice neighbors surrounding me who are the kind who will adapt me and actually look out for me, while i still live in my own house. Then it won’t be so bad living in my own house by myself.
I am ALL alone tonight, and yes, i am scared right now.
Post Two
I am really having a bad night tonight. My TV reception began cutting out, searching for satellite signal was coming on, TV screen pixelating and freezing,—-and it isn’t even stormy here—-AT ALL!!!!
It’s fine now, not doing it anymore—– but yeah—after the nightmare i just had, and discovering that my power had glitched while i was sleeping, well, everything is spooking me right now and yes, i AM all alone here, isolated with no one nearby in this neighborhood to call if i have problems—yes, i could call Connie if i have real problems, but i don’t want to ruin her sleep just because tonight i happen to be scared and need someone here to be with me because i am just scared.
I just don’t like how i am feeling tonight.
I want to cry.
I really do want to move where i have nice neighbors around me day and night who will care and look out for me. I don’t want to live in this aluminum hot rod and mean bully alley anymore.