Monday, July 27, 2009

In The Battlefield Again--Yup----It's Another Monday!!

I have been sleeping very fitfully lately. The mean monsters have ramped up their loud hot rods and motorcycles again today, and are once again parading them as loudly as they can back and forth past my house...several times a day...back and forth they go, to and fro with these demonic engines just roaring, and screaming just like awful loud jets, rockets, cannons, bombs, and amplified lions. It is Monday again..and my weekend was no better. I so wish i could move...!!!!

Anyway, please read my profile, my About Me, and my blogs from the bottom one up--because this will give you my backstory, in as full of detail as i can. I am in hell---and i need help soon, please!!!! Cuz i am so afraid i am going to keel over dead from a heart attack or a stroke--the tension and stress is that bad. Is there anyone out there who can get my story told? So i can finally have rest and relief? I still believe there is a God in Heaven who is going to grant me a miracle soon. I just wish i could be out of here TODAY!!!! And living where all i can hear are the birds--and the wind in the trees---i don't need to be way out in the boonies--just somewhere that is like five miles away from one of the local cities--where i can still get to all my shopping, doctors, and errands, plus the fun stuff that i like to enjoy. I still would very much love to live in East Arroyo Grande---cuz it's so close to the ocean, it is cooler there--and the people are way more laid back and friendlier than they are in Santa Maria, where i am currently "imprisoned", here on Torture-Chamber-Mean-Bully-Street.

About my weekend---on Saturday, one of the businesses East of here, where i have problems--was open, and the mean bullies were all there revving up their loud red Jeep, and the loud motorcycles--and they proceeded to once again parade these over-the-top loud vehicles right past my house all morning and afternoon long. My voice and throat became raw again from all the screams of terror i emitted all day that day. And then, yesterday, Sunday afternoon, i was over at my neighbor's enjoying a nice visit with him, and some other friends. When i came home from that visit, all happy, this cinnamom brown-colored SUV came roaring down the street going Westbound past my house. When this vehicle neared my residence, and they saw me outside, just minding my own business, as i was walking back to my place from next door, they actually proceeded to stop right out in front, where they began to yell at me, laugh at me, and taunt me cruelly. These were teenagers--but--even so, it affected me--and i got sick this morning as a result..and was unable to get the rest of my sleep. Right now, it is 4:27 PM in the afternoon--and--i currently am siting here, as i write this latest entry--and i have to have both of my TV stereo speakers cranked up loud--and my PC's speakers cranked super loud as well--so i won't have to hear the mean demon noise. I am keeping tabs on the minutes when i know the monsters will all go home for the day, and i can then come back out of my shell and live again. I'm sorry, but that's how this affects me. As intelligent as i am--i am still paralyzed by this kind of crap. I simply lack the filters that other people have, that allows them to IGNORE this s**t. It's killin; me, folks. And, even tho i am a believer--i am still not ready to die--not at the age of 49!!!! There are still so many things i want to do in life!!!!

Please, dear Lord in Heaven, let me have my miracle--so i can live again!!!! In Jesus' sweet name i pray. Amen.

4 comments:

Sarah said...

Melissa, I'm going to try to help you. I do not know how long it'll take, but I'm going to try my best.

spunkykitty said...

i m so sorry to hear abt the horrible things u hv been suffering... i m an aspie myself and suffer a painful autoimmune condition all my life... altho i do not experience quite the same kind of public bullying, i fully empathise with u and hope u will find a way to get over all this and keep urself well too...

Fidelcatsro said...

:) your not alone in being alone i wish could help :( i am not crazy or a nut or ranting mad man , I am suffering feel so hurt :) I will anything i can, urrr :) right now im of shouting at everyone becasue i stopped just accepting everyones insults and ah :( oh dear. Hugs . I will soon go back to my tiltin at mad wildmils and silly jokes but :( not sure were you are, but i know that there is not enough care for anyone who suffers. I no longer get friends picking me :( god rid of them and nobody would dar try bullying me, im too big , :( and nobody would dare beleive i wsnt masking excuses Im too smart Im too this im too that hugs :) if ya needs someone to talk to, I offer my agency :( I wont stop caring ever about everyone :) and ah alas i shut up now

Melissa said...

Thank you all for your support--God bless you---it really warms my heart to know ppl are out there finally reading my blog, who "get" what i have to endure! :)